Posted by Peter Brady on Mon 16th April 2007 at 02:50 AM, Filed in Dating Safety
Reading this article will hopefully show you just how much abuse goes on in teenage relationships - shocking facts. These figures are from the USA, but probably not too dissimilar in other countries.
Teen Dating Statistics
• About one in three high school students have been or will be involved in an abusive relationship.
• Forty percent of teenage girls ages 14 to 17 say they know someone their age who has been hit or beaten by a boyfriend.
• In one study, from 30 to 50 percent of female high school students reported having already experienced teen dating violence.
• Teen dating violence most often takes place in the home of one of the partners.
• In 1995, 7 percent of all murder victims were young women who were killed by their boyfriends.
• One in five or 20 percent of dating couples report some type of violence in their relationship.
• One of five college females will experience some form of dating violence.
• A survey of 500 young women, ages 15 to 24, found that 60 percent were currently involved in an ongoing abusive relationship and all participants had experienced violence in a dating relationship.
• One study found that 38 percent of date rape victims were young women from 14 to 17 years of age.
• A survey of adolescent and college students revealed that date rape accounted for 67 percent of sexual assaults.
• More than half young women raped (68 percent) knew their rapist either as a boyfriend, friend or casual acquaintance.
• Six out of 10 rapes of young women occur in their own home or a friend or relative’s home, not in a dark alley.
• More than 4 in every 10 incidents of domestic violence involves non-married persons (Bureau of Justice Special Report: Intimate Partner Violence, May 2000)
There has been much written over the past 12 months about the rise in dating abuse, especially in the USA. Here are a few tips to bear in mind when going on a date.
Dating Safety
• Consider double-dating the first few times you go out with a new person.
• Before leaving on a date, know the exact plans for the evening and make sure a parent or friend knows these plans and what time to expect you home. Let your date know that you are expected to call or tell that person when you get in.
• Be aware of your decreased ability to react under the influence of alcohol or drugs.
• If you leave a party with someone you do not know well, make sure you tell another person you are leaving and with whom. Ask a friend to call and make sure you arrived home safely.
• Assert yourself when necessary. Be firm and straightforward in your relationships.
• Trust your instincts. If a situation makes you uncomfortable, try to be calm and think of a way to remove yourself from the situation.
A new 24 hour telephone and web based support line has recently been launched in the USA. It’s called loveisrespect.org and proving very useful for a number of abused teenagers, allowing them to speak with peers on the subject of dating and violence.
The Helpline numbers are: (866) 331-9474 and TTY (866) 331-8453.
Let’s see a similar service launch here in the UK and the rest of Europe!
Some advice and statistics provided off the loveisrespect.org website:
Ladies and vulnerable gentlemen, here is an article for you about 5 safety/security devices you should take with you on a date early on in the relationship, especially if you are going somewhere slightly private.
1 – Personal Alarm. I’m so surprised more women don’t carry these with them… just in general, let alone when they meet stranger for a date. They are fantastic at putting the wind up anyone attacking you and panicking them ino running away. Buy here.
2 – A Dog. Before you say it, I appreciate it’s difficult taking a dog on a date unless you are blnd or your name is Paris Hilton, but it’s advisable to have a day date the first time you meet, and you can bring your dog or just borrow one from a friend. Atackers would think twice about getting between you because dogs are so unpredictable.
3 – ‘Kick their ass Seabass’. Get yourself to a local defence class. Body Combat is a fantastic way to get fit as well as learn how to protect yourself. I’m not talking about trying out for Karate Kid 8 but I am talking about the very basics of defence – go for the balls on every occasion, it’s man’s Achilles Heel! Book a course here.
4 – Mace or pepper spray. Nice and easy to conceal in your handbag, this is the obvious choice for many. It can certainly put a man off his bad intentions when his eyes feel like they are melting. It’s available pretty much everywhere these days and well worth a purchase. Buy here.
5 - Flouescant die. This stuff is great, you can purchase small viles that are easy to break and spread to clothing, invisible to the human eye. Therefore it would be useful to spill some on your attackers clothes just in case he tries it on and escapes, allowing the police to easily identify the markings.
Be safe.
Dating has become much more liberal these days compared to lets say when are parents ‘courted’. We now don’t raise an eyebrow about sex on an early date, it is just part of the cause – call it free love or whatever you will, we are all doing it.
But beware, the rise of STDs. For instance, Syphalis has risen 2,054% from 1996 to 2005. A shocking statistic I’m sure you will agree. In the same vein Chlamydia has risen by 207% and all diagnoses are up 60%.
So what does this tell us? Basically that not enough of us are taking precautions. It’s easy for the mood to turn highly charged and sexual and therefore all precautions go out the window for the fear they will ‘kill the mood’.
Western governments are recognizing this alarming increase and are investing huge sums of cash into education and safer sex as it costs countries billions of pounds every year.
If you find yourself in this situation, you will be respected more if you suggest using a condom, and have the will power to say “NO” if neither of you have. Make sure you always hae one in your wallet or purse - no-one will think any less of you.
Be careful!
